Aries: March 21st – April 19th

He picks and chooses when to text you back. You catch him posting on social media in the meantime, but if you ever called him out on it, he would lie to you about how busy he has been. He always has an excuse for his poor behavior.

Taurus: April 20th – May 20th

You have seen the inside of his apartment, but you have never met his parents or any other family members. You’ve never been to a restaurant with him either. You only eat fast food together, because he doesn’t want to be caught in public with you.

Gemini: May 21st – June 20th

Whenever you’re out with him, he spends all of his time on his phone, texting other people. He pays more attention to the screen than to you, even though you’re right in front of him. He clearly has a bunch of other girls fighting for his attention.

Cancer: June 21st – July 22nd

His conversations with you are basic. They consist of hey, what’s up, and you up? He never remembers to ask you about the big meeting you were nervous about or your grandmother you told him was sick. He doesn’t remember the little things, or if he does, he doesn’t care enough to mention them.

Leo: July 23rd – August 22nd

When you’re in the same room together, he always turns on the charm. But when you haven’t seen each other in a while, he doesn’t go out of his way to set plans with you or text you first. If he sees you, he sees you. It doesn’t seem to make a difference to him.

Virgo: August 23rd – September 22nd

He waits until the last second to make plans with you. You never have dates scheduled a week in advance. He shoots you a text two hours before he wants to see you to check your availability.

Libra: September 23rd – October 22nd

You are the one who sends the first text every time. You are also the one who plans to get together every time. You do all of the work while he sits on his ass and waits for your attention.

Scorpio: October 23rd – November 21st

He only sends texts after midnight. He never talks to you in the morning or the middle of the day, even if you started the conversation that early. He waits until it’s late, until there is some liquor in him, because he only wants you for one thing.

Sagittarius: November 22nd – December 21st

He still complains about being single. He still uses Tinder. He still considers you just a friend even though you have done some not-so-friendly things with each other.

Capricorn: December 22nd – January 19th

He has gone missing in action more than once. You think he’s ghosting you, but then he pops back into your life when he’s bored. You can never tell whether he’s going to answer your messages or leave you waiting for a full week, because he’s the definition of inconsistent.

Aquarius: January 20th – February 18th

He only talks to you over snapchat. Most of the time, when you’re trying to have a conversation, he replies to your words with pictures that don’t even have a caption. He might not have actually asked for nudes, but he has hinted that he wants them.

Pisces: February 19th – March 20th

He has canceled plans on you more than once without giving you a raincheck. The times when he actually showed up, he showed up late. He left you waiting alone like an idiot, checking your phone every few seconds to see if he was going to show.

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